Erica: Hey, girl. By now, you know I have Her Collective, my online community for ambitious women who are done doing it alone. Her Collective is for the women who are smart, capable, and driven, but they find themselves stuck on the sticky floors like self doubt, burnout, and waiting for permission that quite honestly never comes. Inside HER, you get more than motivation. You get real support, real strategies, and real momentum.

Erica: We work on things like clarifying what you want now and what's coming next, building confidence without burning yourself out, navigating hard conversations, career moves, and leadership moments with clarity, and surrounding yourself with women who actually get it. This isn't about hustling harder. It's about moving intentionally with the right tools and the right people in your corner. If you're ready to stop spinning, start choosing yourself, and build a career in life that actually feels aligned, I'd love to welcome you inside her collective. You can learn more and join us at www.joinhercollective.com.

Erica: Because honestly, girl, you were never meant to do this alone.

Erica: I'm your host, Erica Rooney.

Erica: And today, I have Ronda Robinson. Now Ronda is a talent optimization strategist, which means that she helps companies align their people strategy with their business strategy to retain their employees. And her mission is to infuse more humanity into the workplace. Ronda is the founder of Retain My Team, and her approach blends neuroscience, so how your brain works, with the art of changing how people work. She is also a keynote speaker, and she has been featured on NBC, CBS, FOX, USA Today, and more.

Erica: So, Ronda, thank you so much for being here.

Ronda: Erica, thank you so much for having me. It's always a delight to talk to you. Seems like we could go

Erica: on and on, and our conversations are always fire.

Erica: I know. I love it. Well, I'm super excited to have you here today. So before we kinda dive into your sticky floor moments, I would love to kinda hear a little bit about your journey and how you kind of created and founded Retain My Team.

Ronda: Sure, Erica. So at face value, my resume doesn't really bubble up with the core has always been. I didn't realize this till later, but my core has always been about helping people. But I started off in, pharmaceuticals and biotech sector, really in training and talent development roles for the most. And I did some sales as well.

Ronda: But then after going through several mergers and acquisitions and seeing the impact on the people while it well, well, well, on paper, the impact on the people was always so painful.

Erica: Mhmm.

Ronda: And so I, after the fifth merger and acquisition, drew a line in the sand and said, I've developed all these kinds of tools and techniques to help my inner circle. Let's go bring this out to the world and help companies do better by their employees, not just in m and a's, but in everyday workplace. And as a pandemic hit, then it just amplified everything.

Erica: I can imagine it as someone who has been through a few M and A's, it's always a challenge. Even the best, most clean, and organized ones are always challenging. So I think the work that you're doing is super important. And the more that we can amplify the work that you're doing to help everybody so that it is painless as possible, Well, that'll, that'll be amazing for everybody. But anyways, tell me about your sticky floor.

Erica: One or two words, if you had to pick that, what would it be?

Ronda: Because my sticky floor, when I reflect back even to like my grade school, high school days was this false aura of that everyone else is so much better and equipped to do the things that I wanted to do. Mhmm. Yeah. So for example, I remember my high school basketball coach, Polimius Seidenur, entering into the tournament. She said, Ronda, in practice, you're unstoppable.

Ronda: I need you to be who you are in practice in the game. And it shocked me. I didn't think that I had shown up any differently in practice versus the game. In fact, I felt like I gave more in the game.

Erica: Yeah.

Ronda: So I went home and I talked to my dad about that conversation. And I realized that some of my dad's coaching had seeped into this because well, I was a point guard. So he said, your job is to give other people the ball. Right? You bring the ball up and you give other people the ball.

Ronda: And so I'd always come from a a place of giving so that others can succeed. And I didn't realize how much that had seeped into my own beliefs, not only about basketball, but how I approached my career because fast forward later, and I'd see all these other people being promoted and advancing in their careers. And I feel like, well, Why why am I not being invited Mhmm. To do this? And I'm like, I it took me years of self awareness and self work to realize it's rare that you get invited.

Ronda: You've gotta go for it. And in my early days in corporate, I would see the people at the top in leadership roles. And, again, it had, like, this golden sheen, like, oh, they must have something that I don't have to be in that position. No. One of my favorite books is by Jon Acuff.

Ronda: It's called Soundtracks and he encourages people to ask three questions. When you have this soundtrack that you are telling yourself over and over again, ask number one, is it true? Because our perceptions of ourself change over time and our orientation change over time. So is it true? Is it helpful?

Ronda: So is what I'm telling myself helpful. And then thirdly, is it kind? And as a lot of us women in business, we're very hard on ourselves.

Erica: Mhmm.

Ronda: And we're not always those those soundtracks aren't always kind in the perfectionism and the sticky floor was it was two feet, two feet stuck. Yeah. My self limiting beliefs and the other one is what I was telling myself in self awareness.

Erica: No. I mean, I can understand both of those and I love how you kind of put that analogy of your job is to give others the ball and kind of, cause I can see that in so many women and even probably in different roles in my past where maybe part of my job was to elevate others. And I, and I think there's something powerful in being to elevate having that be your role elevating others, but how can you elevate yourself when you are that point guard and your job is to give others the ball?

Ronda: I think a part of that comes from being self aware and knowing what you want. There are some people that are their DNA is to be in the position that they are and they're and they do want to help others get where they want to be. Others, like for myself, I didn't I didn't know that I wanted to lead a team. I didn't know that I wanted to have a greater impact on the organization. I was doing it in ways that I wasn't aware, but having those candid conversations with yourself.

Ronda: Well, I mean, down and dirty in the dirt dirty fingernails conversation with me, meaning I, for a long time, I thought I didn't want to lead people because I always heard about the HR nightmares. Right? But those are so few and far between. Yeah. And is that really a reason to not want to have a greater impact on a larger number of people and on the organization.

Ronda: And so, again, going back to the soundtracks, is that true? I don't wanna lead people because I don't wanna deal with the HR side. No. There's plenty of people and systems and processes to help you through that, and they don't occur that often.

Erica: Yeah. And on the flip side of that too, I think there's so much around what it really means to be a people leader. Right. And I think, I mean, my perception is your job as a people leader is to give the ball to other people. Right?

Erica: And the more often that your people can score the goals, make the baskets, right, get the three pointers, truth be told, the better you look in the end. Right? But not all leaders walk into management with that kind of relationship. Right? Like, it's so different.

Erica: The people leader individual contributor role when you flip it in that that aspect, like, good people leaders, really solid, strong people leaders are the people who are passing the ball, right, and elevating their team. I mean, that's, that's at least how I try to lead is I try to be the one in the background and let my team drive to success. But it's not,

Ronda: I don't know. True.

Erica: Not so many people, I think understand that aspect about people leading. But I do think on the flip side of that, right, those limiting beliefs that you were talking about is like, okay, that's when it kind of shifts in your mind and it's that I'm not strong enough, good enough, whatever enough to score the basket. Right? And that's where I think the real struggle comes in and the real work has to be done.

Erica: Hey there, listeners. If you have ever felt like you're stuck in a place, held back by self doubt, perfectionism, or that pesky inner critic, you're not alone. We all face those sticky floors that keep us from reaching the heights we dream of. But guess what? It's time to shatter those limiting beliefs and toxic behaviors to uncover infinite possibilities.

Erica: My book, Glass Ceilings and Sticky Floors, is your ultimate guide to smashing through barriers, overcoming limiting beliefs, and stepping into your full potential. This book has been endorsed by none other than the great Mel Robbins, best selling author and motivational powerhouse. It's also been featured in Success Magazine, so you know it's packed with insights that work. Inside, you'll find real life sticky floor stories, practical strategies to help you navigate your own sticky floor moments, and a whole lot of inspiration to keep you climbing. This isn't just a book.

Erica: It's your road map to success, confidence, and freedom. Grab your copy of Glass Ceilings and Sticky Floors today at www.ericaandersonrooney.com. Whether you're in the boardroom, the classroom, or just starting out, this book is for you because no one, and I mean no one, deserves to stay stuck, no one deserves to feel small, and you have glass ceilings to shatter. Let's do this.

Ronda: And I think it's a prime time now for women to be able to advance into leadership roles in an authentic way. And what I mean by that is I started in the industry thirty years ago, and I can't tell you how many teams I was on where I was the only woman or maybe there was one other person.

Erica: Yeah.

Ronda: And for the longest time, we've been conditioned to say that if you want to lead, you need to lead like a man.

Erica: Yep.

Ronda: And so what happens? One of two things. If you try to lead like a man, and I saw this firsthand, that woman now is considered having sharp elbows, and they're cold. And if you show up as a woman per se, I'm using stereotypes here. Right.

Ronda: Then you're considered too soft to lead to handle the business. Mhmm. And I think that that has opened up a lot more now that you can whether you're man, woman, they, she, he, whatever your pronouns are, you can lead with your authentic style and self more so than you ever have been today. So if I can erase perhaps somebody's sticky floor of how they're perceiving the workplace today, that's one gift, like, for today is that is going away. The Yeah.

Ronda: Be your authentic self. But in addition to that, I think that having the opportunity to lead with empathy is now allowed more so than ever. Not only allowed, employees are requiring it. So you talk about giving the ball to other people. Employees want that.

Ronda: We've always had a parent child relationship

Erica: Mhmm.

Ronda: Historically in the workplace, and employees want adult adult relationships. Yeah. Right?

Erica: Gosh. Yeah.

Ronda: And having that ability to now say, yes. I can step into a leadership role and be shoulder to shoulder with my people so that we can all work towards getting the work done is liberating.

Erica: Absolutely. I do think too, that's all all of the, a lot of the focus on diversity, equity and inclusion and bringing your whole self to work. Right. That was lumped in with that of like, we need to be able to bring our whole self to work coupled with COVID. Right.

Erica: And needing empathy in the workplace, like needing a lot of empathy in the workplace really shifted the dynamics about how leaders needed to show up for their people. And how how friends needed to show up for people, how just any type of relationship. I think that really changed with those two events that are very recent. Right? I mean, all of this is still very recent.

Erica: People are still learning to grow and adapt and learning how to lead with empathy. But that's one thing that we work on a lot with our managers, where I work is empathetic leadership and delivering feedback, tough feedback with empathy. Right? Because it's, you have to separate the person from the action. Right?

Erica: Because just because they did something wrong or bad or poor performing doesn't mean they are a poor performer or they are bad or they are wrong. It just means that they did an action that was wrong. And I always try to tell people the first step is awareness, right? Like people, usually people are good. Usually people want to do good things.

Erica: They don't want to offend you. They don't wanna hurt your feelings, but sometimes somebody may say something that is offensive or hurtful. And the first step is always awareness because a lot of times they don't even know they did it. And if you can just approach that person empathetically and with open arms and an open heart and an open mind, say, hey. You said this.

Erica: And that really bugs me. I'm a tell you why. Like, I'm sure you probably didn't mean it, but, like, I'm a let then it usually kind of flips the script. So if anything good came out of COVID, at least really embracing empathetic leadership and bringing data into the workplace. Right.

Erica: Which is naturally a female characteristic, I think is a good thing.

Ronda: Yes. And in a high IQ talent pool, the one skill, the power skill that will set a leader apart is empathy.

Erica: Yeah.

Ronda: And so it's no surprise that that is our number one requested workshop is empathetic leadership right now. Mhmm. But I would offer two things. Number one is we judge ourselves by our intentions. We judge other people by their actions.

Ronda: And just knowing that distinction gives you a little bit of wiggle room to think about the other person's actions may not have been aligned with their intentions. Like you just said, we have good intentions. It just doesn't always show up in how we judge their actions.

Erica: Oh my gosh. When you said that my very first thing went to anytime someone's ever apologized and they've done that, like that wasn't my intention. I'm sorry that you feel X, Y, and Z. And it just gives me cringe worthy moments because it's like, well, I know it wasn't your intention, but

Ronda: this is what you did. But it's owning that Well, I'm and vice versa. We're showing up other people with our actions, not just our intention. Yeah. Right.

Erica: And you have to be able to flip that and realize that in your mind. But, no, that's exactly where my brain went. So okay. You said two things.

Ronda: Right? So judging that that was number one, intentions versus actions. Mhmm. And number two, I'd like to offer a different definition of empathy, which may help unlock some people's willingness to be an empathetic leader.

Erica: Okay.

Ronda: So research shows that seventy percent of leaders feel like either they don't know how to, quote, do empathy or they can't do it consistently. But alarmingly, another almost 70% say that they fear they will be less respected by demonstrating empathy in the workplace. Wow. Hence, why I'm offering this alternate definition. So there's a lot of people think of empathy as bleeding hearts and Hallmark cards and two hour couch time with people to get to their feelings.

Ronda: Right? And a lot of people that's as comfortable as wearing wet socks. It's just not a place for them to go. Instead, Think of empathy as temporarily putting the pause button on your own opinions, bias, and viewpoints of an issue, taking just a moment to walk around the back side of someone's chair to look over their shoulder, just to consider their perspective on an issue. By doing that, you now have additional information to make more informed decisions, more informed decision.

Ronda: Now what business leader would not want to make more informed decisions? You've gathered data points from everywhere else. Why not from the people perspective?

Erica: Absolutely. Now I read a book one time called conversational capacity, and it was very much what you're talking about with this different view, but it basically said, take your opinion, what you think to be true and treat it as a hypothesis, like in a science experiment. Right? By asking clarifying questions to learn more. Right?

Erica: So if I say, Ronda, the sky is blue and you say, no, Erica, the sky is pink. Instead of me being like, Ronda, you're wrong. You're freaking crazy. What are you talking about? I ask you questions to help clarify why you might think the sky is pink.

Erica: So, okay, Ronda. That's interesting. Like, is it hot where you are? Is it cold? Is it the daytime?

Erica: Is the nighttime? And then I learned that it's early morning wherever you are. So the sun is rising and it is very pink sky. Right. And where I live, maybe it's the middle of the day, so it's blue.

Erica: So it doesn't necessarily mean that I'm wrong or I'm right or whatever. It just means like, okay, pause a minute, look at it from their perspective. Right. Ask them clarifying questions. And then you're going to get to that root answer.

Erica: But so many people don't take that minute to stop because I'm looking at my blue sky. Therefore you must be crazy. And then just learn what the real truth is. And I thought that perspective of treating it as a hypothesis And it, it helps you also separate your thoughts, your ideas from yourself. Yeah.

Erica: Which I think is a very important thing too. And that kind of goes back to what I was saying earlier, but like you have to, you, if a person does a bad thing, they're not a bad person. If you have an idea and you have to separate your, or a belief, like if you can separate yourselves from those things, you can look at them a little more subjectively and not be so married to them. I think sometimes I'm look, I'm the first to say I'm very stubborn person sometimes. And if I know that I am right about something, like, sometimes I will dig my heels in.

Erica: So I have to constantly like, that's a sticky floor for me. I have to constantly remind myself to look through the other person's perspective to try to treat it like a hypothesis. I'm like, we're preaching it to myself right now and remember it for the rest of the day.

Ronda: Exactly. I'm a Taurus, and I'm a high driver too. So I don't yeah. I I totally I'm picking up what you're putting down there.

Erica: Yes. Look. My husband and I got into it yesterday because I he bought some chicken. I cooked the chicken. The chicken was a little chewy.

Erica: I thought it was because chicken might have been a little old. He thinks because it was overcooked. Who's right? I don't know, but I wasn't gonna let him win on that one.

Ronda: Throw a little gravy on it, and it's all good.

Erica: It's fine. Eat the dang chicken.

Erica: Oh my gosh. It's so true. But, yeah, I think that's super important. So what other as you were going through your journey, right, I mean, you talk about your first real sticky floor kind of being that person to have to to learn also to, to elevate yourself. What other sticky floors did you encounter?

Ronda: Yeah. I think that the other sticky floor that I encountered was a a condition that I wasn't even aware that I was in. Mhmm. So when I was finding mentors, I found that a lot of the conversation was around as a woman and as a a minority gender in the workplace. Most of the mentorship was around how to show up rather than on the business.

Ronda: And I learned later that the research shows that that is very common, that when women are mentored in the workplace, it's about how they show up as a woman, as a leader in the workplace where men are mentored more on the business side of things. And so now if you're neck and neck, two people, a man and a woman who are trying to get the next promotion, the man typically gets it because they're more informed and well versed in in the business.

Erica: Yeah.

Ronda: And so I've made it a point to mentor folks on the business side of thing because they're gonna show up how they show up anyway. If you try to coach people on how they show up, that just makes them more self aware of how they're showing up.

Erica: Right.

Ronda: And it's kind of a self fulfilling prophecy about being nervous about how you show up. Right?

Erica: Yeah. What's interesting too is this is probably a lot of work that just has to be done in general is met making sure that we're mentoring people in the same way. Right? So if you were mentoring a man, if you were mentoring a woman, I mean, yes, there are going to be different things that affect men and women. Right?

Erica: And I'm not saying ignore those things. But if you would traditionally mentor a man and be like, I'm gonna walk you through these things in the business and I'm gonna do all that, then you need to do that with the female counterparts as well.

Ronda: Mhmm. Absolutely. And I think that the more often you can give mentors a road map about what are the key business objectives and priorities in order to build your succession planning, in order to build bench strength across the organization, the stronger the organization's gonna be because the people are stronger.

Erica: Right.

Ronda: Too often, we lead mentors. Again, this goes to kinda like that shiny veil, that I mentioned earlier. We think mentors know what they're supposed to do.

Erica: Oh, yeah. For sure.

Ronda: And they don't always know what they're supposed to do. Yeah. And so you get this wide variety of focus for the people who are being mentored and the people who are being mentored often are asked, what would you like to learn? Well, you don't know what you don't know. Yep.

Ronda: And you may not always choose the most impactful thing that's gonna grow your career and and grow your strength and learn the business. So I think being a little more purposeful with mentorship is a key a key focus that we should be thinking about because career paths are changing. How we work, where we work, when we work has greatly changed in through the pandemic. And so we gotta rethink as well. How are we putting people through career paths?

Ronda: It used to be a ladder. Then for a while, we did this matrix thing. And now we're sort of acting on technical school where we're laser focusing on specific skills, strengths, etcetera. But maybe we need to take a step back and say in this more heterogeneous world of how and where and when we do work, what should career paths look like?

Erica: And know that they're not always linear. I think that's the big sticky floor for organizations and then also for individuals is they outline this career trajectory or path that they should be taking. Right? And they put people or organizations put people through the motions when in reality, we should be stopping and looking at the individual. Right?

Erica: And treating them as such as a unique individual and then career pathing out that for them, not just be like, okay, you join the community or the company as a project coordinator, you'll graduate to a PM, to a senior PM, to a manager, to check the boxes, because that's not what they all look like these days.

Ronda: Yeah. I'll give you another sticky floor example. So I had gone through, I started off as a sales trainer and I advanced to different levels of being a sales trainer. And through that process, I was exposed to a lot of marketing, and I really felt like I wanted to have a go at some marketing. Well, I had gotten up to a certain grade level in sales training.

Ronda: So in order to go to marketing, even though I've been a part of the marketing group and have contributed in some very meaningful ways, that linear approach would have required that I go not only lateral, but start out the bottom. Yes. Like none of my experience as a sales trainer, all the stuff that I had done to train people how to do the marketing and be part of creating all the marketing as part of the team count it. Yeah. You have to slip back three rungs to go sideways to go back up again.

Erica: That takes the role. Yeah. That is such a thing that I think holds so many people back across the board is because, number one, choose your career path at 18 when you go to college. Right? Have it all figured out.

Erica: Look. We all know that that is, like, damn impossible. Right. So you've gotta pick it out. You go through your four years of schooling, and then you want you get a job.

Erica: It's not what you thought it would be and you wanna switch. Okay. If you're lucky and you do that, like within the year, you'll be okay. But I mean, yeah, just to speak to your point, I was in corporate health and wellness for like seven years before getting into HR. And I had to be comfortable with taking a pay cut and going back down the ladder, in order to try something new.

Erica: So that's such that's a hard sticky floor to work through. Right? Because sometimes you are not it's a level of privilege. Right? Do you have the capability to say, I don't wanna do this anymore.

Erica: I'm going to take a $20.30, $4,050,000 dollar pay cut to explore something that I hope I like, that I think I'll be passionate about. Not everybody can do that.

Ronda: Yeah. Well, that's why as a talent optimization strategist, I'm trying to break the mold of how we think about the people in the organization. Mhmm. And to look at the more like assets that are in the room, everything has, yes, each experience has different value, but it has different value at different times. Organizations change so fast these days.

Ronda: And so, by creating an environment where you can capture not only how, a person is wired, their DNA, kind of how they show up to the world combined with their experience, combined with their skills, but also combined with their motivators. Now, as you let's say you're gonna build a new business unit and you're trying to form a new team and you'd like the majority of people to come from within. Now, instead of relying on the loudest leader in the room, who's trying to promote their own people or by just whoever is on your radar screen that you think you're gonna pull in, you have a database to look at the right people that has the right skills, the right orientation for the type of work that needs to be done. And now you have an opportunity to invite them or have them on your list, if you will, before they even know that it's a thing. So that levels the playing field for d and I initiatives.

Ronda: It levels the playing field for generational skills. It levels the playing field for people who may not want to go upwards or manage people, but might want to continue to grow and advance in their career. And so by looking at it more in terms of what are the skills, experience, knowledge, and behaviors that you want for an ideal job description, you have vastly more resources at your fingertips in an organization than you ever knew that you had.

Erica: Oh, my gosh. Yeah. Absolutely. It's a lot of work we got laid ahead of us. That's for sure.

Ronda: Well, that's why relying on technology to do a lot of that heavy lifting for you. Yeah. Kinda know how to profile the type that you're looking for, then let the database go search, and then you can choose among the folks because some may or may not want to take that that change. And others will be thrilled that you came to them.

Erica: Yeah. Yeah. Very true. Very true. So Ronda, what would you I love to just ask all of my my guests this, but if you were talking to the Ronda playing basketball, passing the ball, letting everyone else succeed succeed right to the very successful Ronda today, what would you tell that Ronda about the sticky floor and what does she need to know?

Ronda: I would have told my yesteryear Ronda to take off the table of what other people might be thinking. When you, when you just compete against yourself, when you grow into the best that you can be in, it sounds kind of like a cliche, but when you really can just start competing against yourself, not thinking, and are you living up to what you think other people should think of you, it really opens up the doors. I mean, I will tell you upfront, I've had no problem with confidence throughout my life. I've always believed in myself. Yeah.

Ronda: But I still let these other influences hold me back. It was my own perceptions and your own perceptions are the one thing that you can control.

Erica: Yeah. No. I think that's sage advice. And I think it's sometimes easier said than done. Right?

Erica: Like, it's a practice to work on your perceptions. Right? And I've actually had a couple other sessions where people have said, like, their sticky floor was telling themselves they weren't good at math.

Ronda: And then

Erica: they just they were never good at math. And now they're both in, like, one of them's in a comp and bend role where all she does is numbers. And another one was years and years and years as an HR analyst dissecting data. And it's like, but for so long, they had this perception of just, I'm not good at numbers. I'm not good at math.

Erica: So it's not for me. Right. And discounting themselves before they even like took a moment to, to check that out. So it's a practice.

Ronda: Mhmm. So the first question, is it true?

Erica: Is it true? And do the work to figure out if it's true or not. Don't just say yes. It's true because I've always thought it's true.

Ronda: Mhmm. Exactly.

Erica: Dissect that belief. Oh, I love how you just brought that back. So so, Ronda, where can people find you? Where can they find any information about Retain My Team if they wanna reach out?

Ronda: You bet. So I'm everywhere, and I love to connect. Yes. So, yes, retainmyteam.com is our main website. We've launched a new YouTube channel, retain my team with Ronda Robinson, where you can get free tips on and tutorials on, different things that we've done on various topics in the workplace.

Ronda: And I'm on LinkedIn, Facebook, follow Ronda Robinson, Twitter. Just, look for the bright orange and blue logo. Yep. That's where we're at.

Erica: Awesome. Well, I will link all of those in my show notes for anyone who is interested. You can just check those out, and I'll you can click away, get right to Ronda. But, Ronda, thank you so much for your time. I so appreciate it.

Ronda: Erica, always a rich conversation with you. Love talking about these topics. You're doing great things. Keep up the good work.