Erica: Hey, girl. By now, you know I have Her Collective, my online community for ambitious women who are done doing it alone. Her Collective is for the women who are smart, capable, and driven, but they find themselves stuck on the sticky floors like self doubt, burnout, and waiting for permission that quite honestly never comes. Inside HER, you get more than motivation. You get real support, real strategies, and real momentum.

Erica: We work on things like clarifying what you want now and what's coming next, building confidence without burning yourself out, navigating hard conversations, career moves, and leadership moments with clarity, and surrounding yourself with women who actually get it. This isn't about hustling harder. It's about moving intentionally with the right tools and the right people in your corner. If you're ready to stop spinning, start choosing yourself, and build a career in life that actually feels aligned, I'd love to welcome you inside her collective. You can learn more and join us at www.joinhercollective.com.

Erica: Because honestly, girl, you were never meant to do this alone. Oh my gosh, y'all. I am turning 40, the big four o in in just a day. If you're listening to this when this drops, tomorrow, February 20 is my fortieth birthday. Holy shit, y'all.

Erica: But whenever I think about turning 40, I just go back to thinking when I was younger how old it felt, how old 40 seemed. Like, that just felt so geriatric. Right? Like, orthopedic shoes and fiber supplements. And I mean, hey, I take magnesium at night.

Erica: What can I say? But now that I'm here, holy moly. Like, I I'm so excited. I'm so excited. I'm so thrilled.

Erica: I feel just limitless, like infinite possibilities are ahead. And I've got 40 things, 40 hard earned, soul shaking, life altering lessons that I'm gonna share with you. So buckle up because this episode is packed, but I am so glad that you are here with me. Welcome to the Glass Ceiling and Sticky Floor podcast, the show that's here to empower you to break free from limiting beliefs, ditch toxic behaviors, and unlock the infinite possibilities waiting for you. This is your time to live your best life unapologetically.

Erica: I'm Erica Rooney, your host and biggest cheerleader on a mission to get more women into positions of power and keep them there where they belong. If you're ready to shatter ceilings, crush self doubt, and build a career and life overflowing with growth and abundance, you're in the right place. Here's the deal. We talk about the hard stuff here. Imposter syndrome, perfectionism, fear, and burnout.

Erica: You name it. It's raw. It's honest, and it's exactly what you need to level up. So grab a seat, pop it in earbud, and let's dive in. Alright.

Erica: Welcome back. Welcome back. Y'all, can you believe that this is my fortieth birthday? It's such it's such a big one. It's a whole new decade.

Erica: And I think about the last time I had a big decade birthday, I was pregnant with Hudson. So, like, wasn't that exciting, it felt like. But, anyways, I wanted to pop in here and talk about this whole birthday thing because I just feel so much more alive and so much more like myself than I think I ever have. And it's like I finally get it. So today I want to share with you 40 of the most powerful, the most gut wrenching, and game changing lessons that I have learned over the past forty years.

Erica: Now some of these you're gonna be nodding along saying heck yes, Erica. Totally get it. Some of these, they're gonna make you nod along like heck yes, Erica. Totally get it. Some of them are gonna hit you in the feels, I'm sure.

Erica: And some of them I think are going to be exactly what you need to hear today. So let's go. 40 things in forty years. Number one, everyone is not gonna like you. That was a big one for me.

Erica: I spent years, decades of my life shape shifting myself, changing myself with the smallest of things just to fit in, just to belong. So that was a big lesson for me. I I remind myself every day people are not gonna like you. That's not an opinion. That is a fact.

Erica: And the sooner that I accept that, the freer I become. Number two, nothing is ever certain. If you think you are walking one path, boom, all of a sudden life is gonna hand you a left turn. It might be frustrating. It might make you wanna pull your hair out.

Erica: You might just feel like you're going crazy sometimes, but other times it leads you exactly where you need to go. Third lesson, life is hard. That's it. Life is hard. No one escapes pain, loss, or heartbreak.

Erica: Okay? But those are the moments that are really going to shape the person you become. The next lesson, the lows make the highs even sweeter. So all of those hard times, they don't mean you're failing. They don't mean you're bad at something.

Erica: It just means that you are learning and that you are growing. Another lesson, wine is not your friend. I know a lot of people don't wanna agree with me on this, but listen, wine numbs you out, it isolates you, and it makes you check out instead of leaning in. And life is meant to be felt. It's not meant to be numbed out, so wine is not your friend.

Erica: Next lesson, find your tribe and love them hard. The right people, the right people for you, they're not gonna require you to change who you are. They are not going to require you to constantly prove your worth. So when you find those people, those are the people you can text every day or you can text once a quarter. It doesn't matter.

Erica: They've got your back. Find them, love them hard. Lesson number seven, your fitness routine does not have to be all out all the time. Move your body because you get to not because you have to. Lesson number eight, your job title does not define you.

Erica: For years I spent climbing the corporate ladder just reaching for the next title, the next salary, the next paycheck, and and that's great to want to grow and to want to challenge yourself, but not if you're tying your worth to your paycheck, not if you're tying your worth to your job title because at the end of the day, what happens when all of that gets stripped away? Who are you if you don't have those things? So do not let your job title or your paycheck define you. It means nothing if it is crushing your soul. Lesson number nine, the real flex here, this is a big one, the real flex is peace.

Erica: You don't have to prove yourself to anyone else. Just prove yourself to you. That's it. Prove yourself to you. No one else.

Erica: Lesson number 10, anxiety is not your enemy. I don't think I really learned that one until this past year, but she is not someone to fight. She's not someone to duke out and go up against. She is a part of you. And if you're someone that has anxiety or struggles with depression and all of that, when you stop running from those things and you embrace them as part of who you are, you can start to harness those things for good and everything will shift.

Erica: Now lesson number 11, kind of goes with this theme here, but stop worrying about what other people think. Oh, it's a hard one. Right? Like, it is a hard one because we are hardwired to want to belong. But the moment that you stop living for approval of others, it's the moment that you actually start living.

Erica: That's when you start to feel that peace. Okay? Lesson number 12, you can do hard things. The book you never thought you'd write, the podcast you never thought you'd start, look at you now. Yes.

Erica: Now, of course, those are my accomplishments and they're for me, but you too, you do hard things. Right? You overcome incredibly hard things and challenges, so give yourself a pat on the back. Lesson number 13, respect is greater than titles. If your leaders and peers don't respect you, get yourself out the door.

Erica: You always have a choice. You don't have to stay there. Now I'm not saying be crazy and be reckless. Right? Head in the clouds, boots on the ground.

Erica: Be smart. Lesson number 14, close doors lead to better ones. Stop staring at the one that shut. Turn around, find that open window. Lesson number 15, do what matters to you, not what society says you should do.

Erica: Lesson number 16, you don't have to fix every relationship. Some things are not yours to repair. If if you have a bad relationship with somebody right now, maybe that's okay. Right? If someone else in your family has a conflicting relationship with each other, it is not your job to repair that.

Erica: Right? Everyone here is an adult. Let them be their own adult selves and fix their own relationships. Lesson number 17, boundaries are your best friend. Set them, keep them, love them, honor them, evaluate them, reinstate them.

Erica: Do what you gotta do, but get yourself some boundaries. Lesson number 18, self trust comes from keeping your word to yourself. Don't be the person who shows up for everyone but you and you know exactly what I'm talking about. Lesson number 19 is do the thing. The scary thing.

Erica: The big thing because that thing will lead to so many more possibilities. Now lesson number 20. You will never know all the things. So I want you to stop pretending like you do and instead I want you to stay curious. Right?

Erica: This world is filled with so much that we don't know and the more we can dig deep and ask questions the better it is. And you know what, guys? I know I said that I was going to give you all 40 of these life lessons today, but I've already been talking for, like, ten minutes and I feel like that's probably enough of you hearing this mouth chitter chatter all day long. So I'm gonna plug it there. The next one that is dropped by me will be the next 20 lessons that I learned as I gracefully go into these forties of mine.

Erica: But y'all, how crazy is this? Right? I feel like I am just on the edge, on the verge of something amazing and incredible. And I'm just so glad that because there's forty years like this is what it's been so far I can only imagine what the next forty are going to be like but what I can tell you now is that is that at 40 I know my worth. I don't settle.

Erica: I don't let fear dictate my decisions. Right? Or my life. But the biggest realization that I had. Right?

Erica: In turning 40. One of the biggest is that the best is yet to come. It really is. And there's gonna be highs and there's gonna be lows and there's gonna be all this chaos and mess in between but all of that is the beauty of it. And so if you're struggling, I get it.

Erica: Right? It's hard sometimes and you can't be all positive and rainbows and butterflies, but just know that if you are in a low season right now and if you are struggling that it's okay because without those tough seasons without those challenges like you would never know the highs. You would never know the amazing parts about what is going on. So I don't know. Happy birthday to me.

Erica: Thank you for being here with me. Thank you for being on this journey with me. Stay tuned for the next episode which will have the next 20 lessons that I have learned as I approach 40. So thank you for listening to the glass ceiling and sticky floor podcast. If you liked this podcast please do me a favor rate, review, and subscribe to the podcast because it truly helps it land in the hand of the woman who's made to hear it most.

Erica: Now if you enjoyed this podcast and you want more community, more powerful women, more Erica in your life, sign up for Her Collective. That is an online digital community filled with incredible women who are looking to grow, connect, and climb the corporate ladder without sacrificing their sanity for their success. We are having a blast. We have weekly coaching calls. We have monthly master classes, all sorts of amazing activities.

Erica: We're kicking off a challenge in March so that would be a great time for you to join, and I hope to see you in there. If you are interested, head to joinhercollective.com. That's www.joinhercollective.com.